3.07.2014

exhale.


it hasn't strictly been quiet hospital visits and calls to the Critical Care nurses for updates this week.  there have been other, happier things scattered about of course.  thank goodness for those things.  things like a surprise cache of carrots found as Claire and I were out in the garden yesterday prepping the beds a bit once it had warmed up some in the afternoon.  "they're sooooo sweet, Mama, wow!"

oh yes, they are.
sometimes soul food and good medicine are disguised as dirty little root vegetables, 
you know?


we've got a few trays of onion (3 kinds), leek, and shallot seeds just starting to sprout under lights in the office/classroom.  I'm amazed that a count before bedtime of 13 sprouted seedlings can turn into 22 by morning, and 39 by the following night.  those little seeds- they are amazing.  I'm so glad we're starting them in the house this year, as opposed to down in the basement.  we have much more room for trays down there, but up here they're getting all sorts of love and attention.



she has been very much into writing these days.  sometimes letters, often words.  copying some and sounding out others (that says 'jet' up there, that funny one- she's always making sure that she's got her 'Es' covered in the horizontal marks department).  she has also been getting out some works again and doing them on her own, which is leading me to believe it may be time for me to get it together and begin to offer her some sort of regular 'school' rhythm.  I'm so intent on not pushing her, but I'm happy to follow her lead.


and then there's art.  always, always art.  she is a natural , I do believe.


humor me and allow me to give you the description of this picture that was given to me.  it went something like this:

"this is a house with a birthday party inside. the little dots in the windows are all balloons. outside there are carrots- they are still under ground because they are still growing, and kale.  I'm wearing my princess dress and climbing a ladder to smell that tall, pretty flower.  on the other side is a fruit tree that has plums, blueberries, apples, and bananas.  also, another flower.  in the sky are raindrops (they are the red things) coming from the cloud (it's pink, naturally), a sun, bumblebees, and (this is my favorite part) a magic window in the sky."

and there you have it, folks. straight from the horse's mouth.


and so, these are the sorts of things (along with tea, smoothies, those little plants I've already told you about, that quilt purchase, perusing this etsy store of one our blog swappers, a couple episodes of Call the Midwife, and some knitting) that have been keeping me feeling calm and steady and soothed as I've been worrying about that laid-up mama of mine.

and, well.... I am beyond pleased to report that, while she has in fact not been moved out of ICU yet, she has really and truly made some real progress over the last 24 hours.  they have been able to take her off of the BiPap, so she is using just the nasal cannula for O2 supplementation and her levels are holding in an acceptable range.  if she continues to do so overnight and they can wean her O2 supplementation percentage down just a bit, she'll be cleared to move into a regular room tomorrow.  according to her husband, one of the nurses told him hers was the worse case of pneumonia she'd seen in years, and her initial nurse upon admission told him that had she not come in right away, had she waited another 12-24 hours, she may have gone into full respiratory failure and not come out of it.  these are things I'm letting stew in my mind, but only very little.  because thank goodness, those are not 'what-ifs' that need be entertained.

Claire and I are driving out to see her in the morning.  Homemade chicken broth, big love and smiles, and a nourishing smoothie in tow.  I've talked to Claire a bit about hospitals, told her they were full of germs and sick folks and that she must wash her hands a lot while we're there.  and that she can't lick the floor, or anything like that.

it's damn good to be getting towards the other side of all of this.  I no longer feel those bricks crushing down on my chest, and what a relief that is, for everyone.  good work, mama~ keep it up!

21 comments:

  1. Isn't it amazing what a few carrots and some seeds growing does for your soul. Good news about your mama, long may the improvements continue. God bless.

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    1. yes indeed, and thanks so much~

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  2. what amazing news to hear! I'm thrilled that your mom is feeling better and is out of the woods and that you in turn are seeing the ordinary beauty of the every day.

    Love your daughter's drawing and her description-she is talented, imaginative and so so very happy :)

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    1. thank you, Karen! she is finally, as of this afternoon, in a 'step-down' room (out of ICU). still being closely monitored, and the pulmonologist says at least 4 weeks recovery out of work, but improvement, indeed!

      Claire is most certainly imaginative and talented in the art department, and yes generally quite happy, I like to think.

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  3. You made my morning Amanda when I read your mama is moving so well in the right direction. I know the broth and smoothie will be a welcome gift.

    And the gift of surprise root vegetables is always a welcome sight. I might need to take a stroll in my mud patch to see if there are any surprises.

    Your wee is so adorable. I love her drawings and her narrations, what a doll.

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    1. thanks, Tracey~ she is finally out of the ICU, a big step in the right direction! And she drank nearly the whole quart of bone broth!

      oh those narrations are always SO much fun!

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  4. Dirty root vegetables are amazing things. I love your little glimpses of spring sprouting. All the best to your mom.

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    1. thanks much, Fern~
      we're getting into garden planning a bit now for the coming season, I am SO ready for Spring!

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  5. So glad to hear your mama is doing better. My mom was sick around this time two years ago and it's amazing how it helps you notice the "little things". And hooray for super sweet carrots.

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    1. thank you, Heather~ I like to think I always noticed the little happy things anyway, but yes, going through something like this just opens you up even more to appreciating any goodness in your path, doesn't it?

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  6. Amanda, so good to hear your mom is doing better. What a relief it must be. A little weight has lifted off... your mom is going to love to see you and Claire with all your goodies, and hugs and smiles. She's a lucky mom and grandma! Thinking of you. Have a good weekend.

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    1. a HUGE relief! thank you, Marcela. she was finally moved out of the ICU this afternoon, and continues to improve slowly. I feel like I really know the whole concept of a 'heavy heart' now- because when she was really bad there for a bit, it definitely felt like there was a bag of bricks on my chest.

      you too!

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  7. Glad to hear your mother is in the mend. Love Clare's pic. A keeper for sure.

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    1. thank you, Rach~ I wrote her description and the date on the back of the picture, and it will definitely be filed away for safe keeping. (once it comes off of the wall, that is)

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    2. :) yep... you already do it.... haha :)

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  8. ummm. oh my gosh. DO NOT lick the hospital floor.
    Glad mom is feeling a little better. : )
    And...weird question...but what potting soil do you use for seeds?

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    1. yeah, I think I may have gone overboard and freaked her out a little before going to the hospital, as if it wasn't odd enough for her to see her beeba (that's my mom, to Claire) with all of those tubes and things. I threw in the 'don't lick the floor' thing to try and lighten up the conversation a bit, but she just looked at me all seriously.

      yes, finally out of the ICU as of yesterday!

      totally not a weird question. we make ours using equal parts compost, vermiculite (or similar), and rehydrated coconut coir (it originally called for peat moss, which feels great and is so lovely, but sadly isn't very sustainable). cheerio!

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  9. oh amanda, i am so glad that she is doing better! and thank goodness for the sweet little things :) i just love that picture... it is so wonderful. make sure you write that little story on the back with the date because you will forget :) you probably already do that and don't need to be told but i didn't know to do it with my first and sadly forgot some of the story to some of those wonderful pictures. i think my favorite part is "the magic window in the sky" :)... and look at her with that math! you are such a good mama. i always have craft "work" available for the kiddos, but i should really get out some math "work"... thanks for the inspiration!!

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    1. thanks, Jenny~ I have several Montessori-inspired math and language works available for her and this past week she has really been showing a lot of interest.

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  10. Oh! That letter "E"! Both my guys used to make their E's that way! I miss it...

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    1. I take care not to correct these things right out of her, for sure!

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thanks for taking the time to read and comment~