oh dear, sweet girl.  three and a half is knocking at our door and I'm greeting it with a mix of relief and wonder.  wondering.  it would seem that the roughest patches of three are on their way out, for the most part.  we still have our moments, of course.  we always will. I've got plenty of them myself.  but mostly we are navigating these often murky waters of toddlerhood and toddler parenting together and with as much grace and courtesy and consideration as we can muster.  it isn't always pretty and we aren't always particularly graceful or courteous or considerate, but we try.  try.  fail.  love.  forgive.  repeat.


the love I have for her brings me to my knees daily.  this girl.  my little bird.  those wings are itching to spread more and more these days, and I can see that my work is on feeling at peace with it happening.  but I have absolutely no intentions to rush it, and am happy to still carry this not-so-baby around when that's what she wants.  sometimes, when she first asks, arms reaching up and often with a needy and tired expression on her little face, I want to say "no honey, you're too big for that".  but instead, I swallow those words, scoop her up and wrap her in my arms that are plenty capable of still carrying her, and, taking notice of the way our bodies still fit together so nicely in this position, I breathe it in and smile.  she will stop asking soon enough.  too soon.


  1. I still (very occasionally) carry my big Elsa girl. You are doing so great and Claire is such a delight.

  2. oh amanda. what a beautiful post; it brought tears to my eyes. i can SO relate to this. i so know how that feels...bea's wanting to be carried and i always oblige (and she is getting heavier). the try>love>fail>forgive>repeat. the immense love that brings us to our knees. we are blessed.

    you are a wonderful mama. thank you for this post.


thanks for taking the time to read and comment~